Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Start small and do it now.

The shelter where I work is situated in the east end of the downtown core, an area that is currently undergoing massive reconstruction and renewal. Yesterday, the bridge leading across the river was shut down to vehicular traffic for a month. All access to the centre was re-directed via a main route to the south. Suddenly, there's one way in and one way out of the shelter. Suddenly, we're isolated.

It's a funny feeling. Where once traffic flowed constantly in and around us, we are now an island of serenity -- except for the massive earth moving equipment digging and moving dirt.

In some ways, the isolation is symbolic. Being homeless is isolating. Your life is in a constant state of chaos. The dirt is thick and oppressive. There's destruction everywhere.

And that's the thing about the redevelopment of the area in which our centre is located. It's taken years for the city and planners to get to this point where reconstruction can begin, just as it took years to get to the level of decay that was evident for so long in the neighbourhood.

Homelessness, while it may happen in one night, is not an over-night occurrence. It takes time for someone's life to devolve into such chaos. Sometimes it takes years. But once it sets in, it takes massive planning, upheaval, and reconstruction to change.

Homelessness is not an incident in someone's life. It's a symptom of something massively wrong.

Like an area of the city that is under reconstruction, homelessness requires patience, understanding and commitment to change.

For years, city planners, architects, engineers, environmentalists have worked to create a vision for the east end of the city that reflects the diverse needs of the current residents, while also providing for the needs of the newcomers. Land was acquired, buildings removed and ground torn up to prepare for the 'new growth'. While many believe this development has taken too long, the reality is, its taken as long as its taken and now its begun.

In life, the changes we're experiencing sometimes seem to be more about 'going to the dogs' than 'going places' we want to be. Our lives seem to be upheaving some mighty big chunks of dirt that block our vision from seeing we're getting to a place where renewal can happen. Yet, somewhere within us, our psyches are busily planning, and scheming, looking for ways to create new growth out of the dirt of the past. We need patience, love and compassion for ourselves to allow it to happen -- yet, if we give ourselves the opportunity to create anew, we have the chance to change our lives from where we're at to where we want to go.

Growth is not an overnight occurrence. We gotta Start Small. Start Now.

When I was released from the nightmare of my relationship with Conrad, my life was in utter disarray. The problems looked (and felt) HUGE. I knew I couldn't fix them all over-night. I knew I couldn't change one iota of the past. So, I worked with the moment, the very moment I was in. "What can I do right now," I asked myself, "that will make a difference to my life today?"

In that question I gave myself permission to Start Small. Start Now.

I left the burden of 'the problem' up to God, to the Universe, to the Divine to carry so that I could focus on what steps I could take, right now, to make change happen.

To sit back hoping that someday, some way, someone will make things right is to go on feeding the crocodile, hoping he will eat you last -- but eat you he will.” Ronald Reagan

There is no better time to change your life than the moment you're in. It's easy to look at tomorrow and say, "I'll get to it. Let me just enjoy where I'm at today." Getting to it starts now. Not tomorrow. Not a week from now. It starts right now.

The question is: Are you waiting for tomorrow to make a change? Are you expecting happiness to arrive at some future date when you will be ready to accept it? Where are you letting someday possibilities hold you back from accepting today's limitless possibility?

No comments: